Saturday, September 26, 2009

Sara Callif: Blog Crasher

“The children are our future.”
Given that I was trapped in Jewish days schools, where indoctrination was key, from the ages of 2½ through 13, I’ve heard that saying about a gajillion times too many. However, I had never truly thought about its significance until the other day.

It all started with cereal. I pulled out a box of Honey Nut Cheerios and found this:

Just a box of Cheerios, right?
Look a little closer.

It comes with a prize. *gasp*
But wait…there’s something wrong with this…
Even though the prize is a credit card, it says, "CA$H" on it.

This raises a huge issue. Any child who eats General Mills cereal has seen this “cash card.” Those poor kids won’t be able to tell the difference between cash or credit – even paper or plastic! And before you can say supercalif(heylookitsalmostmylastname!bythewaythisissaracallifwriting)ragilisticexpialidocious, the world will overflow due to poor people and pollution.

To sum up this rant, if the children are the future, and they eat General Mills cereal, then we, as the present (or are we the past?) are screwed. No human can save us now. Our only hope is prayer – to FSM.

And just in case that doesn’t work, I’ll be buying a one-way ticket to Hell. Feel free to join the party.


~Sara Callif

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